In a surreal twist that could only be concocted in the culinary carnival of Flavortown, renowned chef and TV personality Guy Fieri reportedly gave the boot to none other than Hollywood royalty, Tom Hanks, from his diner. The reason? Fieri’s accusations of Hanks being “ungodly and woke” sent shockwaves through the gastronomic world, leaving diners scratching their heads and reaching for the nearest plate of Trash Can Nachos.

Picture the scene: Tom Hanks, the embodiment of the quintessential American everyman, strolls into a Guy Fieri establishment, likely anticipating a comforting meal amidst the neon-lit ambience. Meanwhile, Fieri, with his signature spiked hair and flamboyant persona, patrols the kitchen like a culinary rockstar.

As Hanks settles in, perhaps eyeing Fieri’s notorious creations with curiosity, the mood takes an unexpected turn. Fieri, recognizing the Hollywood legend, approaches with a bombshell declaration, branding Hanks as “ungodly and woke” and promptly showing him the door.

The accusation itself seems like a punchline from a comedy skit, especially when directed at Hanks, whose wholesome image has long been synonymous with decency and goodwill. What prompted Fieri’s outlandish characterization of the actor? Was it Hanks’ portrayal of morally upright characters, or simply his reputation for kindness and humility?

Adding another layer of absurdity to the scenario, imagine Hanks not just as an actor, but as a clandestine culinary critic with impossibly high standards and a “woke” palate. In this alternate reality, he’s the nightmare of every diner, capable of dissecting flavors with surgical precision.

Back at the diner, bewildered patrons witness the spectacle unfold, their jaws dropping along with their half-eaten burgers. Fieri, the self-proclaimed guardian of hearty cuisine, stands firm in his decision, while diners struggle to digest the bizarre turn of events in the midst of their mealtime reverie.